


when you smile (i fall apart)

by mythoughtsmymind



Category: Amar a Muerte (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, F/F, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-17
Updated: 2020-05-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:54:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22763557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythoughtsmymind/pseuds/mythoughtsmymind
Summary: a little glimpse into Juliana and Valentina's future... and their child's future tooseries of one-shots
Relationships: Valentina Carvajal/Juliana Valdés
Comments: 22
Kudos: 149





	1. photos

**Author's Note:**

> the title is 100% from Hamilton

Juliana never thought that would be the life she’d live. Maybe she’d dreamed about some of it when she was a small child; a job she liked, a stable life, no constant drama. But she knew these were just dreams, which didn’t make them true, after all, she always dreamed she was flying and that was pure fiction.

The woman, who now lived a completely different reality, was once a little girl that realized her surroundings would never allow her to have what she considered a normal life. A life where she had a room of her own, where her parents would always go to her school meetings, where she had no need to be afraid to mess up a little. Little did Juliana know that something much bigger awaited her.

Maybe she didn’t get all she dreamed of when still a child; she never actually had a room of her own, her mother was only able to attend one or two parent meetings and she lived most of her life in fear. But at least now she knew her future would be different: she’d share her room with the love of her life, she’d never miss a single meeting of her daughter’s school and now she could live with no fear of being happy.

It had passed a long time since Juliana and Valentina had gone through their life’s share of disasters. Throughout the years the younger woman had conquered her dream of becoming a fashion designer and the older one, hers of becoming a model. The pair were still madly in love, even after a few of years of marriage and a child.

Juliana was at their apartment at the end of what was to her a day off. She had her next collection ready to launch and had a few days for herself before the big release. The woman decided to take those days to relax and prepare herself mentally for what would be a chaotic week, preparing the final details of the collection release event. That day specifically, she caught herself looking at old pictures of her and her wife, from way before their five year old was born or they were even married.

The brown eyed woman got caught in a photo of when they had first started officially dating, after Valentina confessed her love for Juliana on national television. The picture was taken in the backyard of the Carvajal’s mansion; at that moment, the couple didn’t know they were being photographed by Guille, but it had grown to be one of their favorite pictures together. The pair were on the grass, Valentina’s head on Juliana’s lap, her hand reaching up to touch the other girl’s face while she laughed at what was probably a stupid joke.

The contemplation of pictures was interrupted by the sound of turning keys on the front door. Valentina entered the room alongside Olivia, who ran towards Juliana

“Mami!” The small girl yelled, throwing herself at her mother’s arms, who had kneeled to reach Olivia’s height.

“Hi, baby” Juliana smiled into the hug “I missed you today.”

Valentina watched the scene with a smile on her face; seeing her wife and her daughter, her family, together never ceased to make her happy. Juliana stood up from the ground with their daughter still clinging to her neck.

“Hi, amor.” she said approaching Valentina and pecking her lips softly.

“Hey! Didn’t you miss me too?” Valentina provoked, erupting laughter from her daughter.

“Val, you didn’t even give me time to tell you that I missed you.” Juliana said rolling her eyes, but still pulling her wife into a hug with her free arm, holding Olivia with the other “Of course I missed you.” She completed, giving Valentina a tender kiss on her forehead.

“Family hug!” Olivia cheered, removing one arm from Juliana’s neck to wrap it around Valentina.

“Ay, cuanto amor!” Valentina said, peppering kisses on her daughter’s face and then doing the same thing to Juliana, making both girls laugh “What is that mess on the floor?”

After their little family moment, Valentina finally noticed the hundreds of loose pictures and albums spread on their living room carpet.

“I was just having a look at some of our old pictures,” Juliana said pulling away from their family embrace and walking towards the pictures, after transfering Olivia to Valentina’s lap “There are some gems in here.” She completed her sentence grabbing the picture she was looking at before her wife and her daughter arrived home.

Valentina smiled once Juliana handled her the photograph, remembering the moment and their lives as a young couple. Olivia was trying to grab the picture with her little hands so the older woman just handed it to her for the little girl to see her mothers as teenagers still.

“Be careful with this picture, baby,” Valentina warned her daughter once she saw her pressing her tiny fingers on random spots of the photograph and leaving grease marks all over “We can’t lose this one, it’s mami’s favorite.”

“Mamá, is that you?” Olivia pointed at Valentina’s young figure.

“Yes, mi amor,” She confirmed to her daughter “And this is mami. Tío Guille took this picture of us a long time ago.”

“Mami, do you have pictures from when I was little?” Olivia asked, making Juliana laugh.

“Amorcito, you’re still little,” she approached her daughter and kissed her chubby cheek “You’re our little girl.”

“No, I’m not! I’m five mami.” Olivia contested, getting cranky. She was probably tired from all the playing they did on her school, Juliana was pretty sure it was sports day. The little girl tended to get very moody when she was tired.

“You’re right,” Valentina stepped in, trying to avoid a tantrum “You’re our big girl now.”

“I’ll show you pictures from when you were little,” Juliana said, making Olivia scream in excitement “But first we need to have dinner and get ready for bed.”

“Do I have to take a bath?” Their daughter asked, slightly annoyed.

Valentina sniffed Olivia’s head and made a silly face, making her daughter laugh.

“Yeah, you do,” She said waving one of her hands in front of her nose “You stink.” Valentina kept on with the joke, causing Olivia to laugh even harder.

The family then went on to have their usual night routine. They all sat together for dinner and talked about Olivia’s new “big girl school” (that’s what they were calling preschool at their house). The little girl was really excited about all the new friends she was making and she thought it was the coolest thing ever how her classmate, Jess, had not one, but two toy dinosaurs.

“Can I get a toy dinosaur, mamá?”

“Maybe you’ll get one on your birthday.” Valentina answered.

Juliana laughed a little. She knew by the way her wife was that Olivia would probably find a whole family of dinosaurs laying in her bed the next day when she came back from school. The older woman loved spoiling their kid.

After dinner, Valentina said she’d help Olivia get ready for bed so that Juliana could clean all the mess she made. The brunette knew her wife was trying to deprive Juliana from any kind of trouble, Valentina knew how stressful the next week would be and just wanted her partner to relax as much as she could.

“Thank you.” Juliana whispered to Valentina, keeping Olivia from hearing her. She didn’t want her daughter to feel like she was a hassle to her, she just didn’t really want to play whatever part she would have to on Olivia’s bath time/ theatre presentation.

After putting away the pictures and selecting some from when Olivia was a baby to show her the next day as promised, Juliana walked into the apartment’s balcony.

The woman closed her eyes, feeling the cool breeze blow in her face. She started thinking about the little family she had now and she couldn’t stop the large smile that came to her face. Her smile somehow intensified when she felt arms wrapping around her waist. Juliana sighed and leaned back into Valentina’s arms, putting her hands on top of the other woman’s arm and enjoying the sensation of being reunited with her wife after spending the whole day apart.

Juliana opened her eyes a couple minutes into their embrace, leaning her head on Valentina’s shoulder to look at her. Valentina met Juliana’s gaze and both women smiled.

“Olivia is out cold.” Valentina broke their silence, erupting a laugh from Juliana, who turned around on her embrace and wrapped her arms around the taller woman’s shoulder.

After her laughter died down, a comfortable silence was established between them again. Juliana looked at Valentina’s eyes; it was impossible to miss the intensity of the love on the younger woman’s eyes.

“I still can’t believe all of this is real.” Juliana stated, remembering her thoughts from earlier: how had her life taken such a turn?

“It is, mi amor,” Valentina said softly, pulling Juliana fully into a hug “It’s real and it’s all I’ve always dreamed of.” she muttered into her hair.

Juliana parted them just enough so she could press her forehead against Valentina’s, closing her eyes once again with a happy sigh.

“I didn’t know it was possible to love this much.” Juliana whispered.

“Someone’s sappy today,” Valentina joked, placing a kiss on her wife’s forehead “Te amo tanto.” she completed after a while, in a much more serious tone.

Juliana opened her eyes with a smile. She leaned her head back so she could look properly into Valentina’s eyes. The kiss that followed was inevitable; words weren’t enough to express what she felt at that moment anymore, so she poured all her love into her actions, cupping the other woman’s face, on the softest kiss possible.

Maybe Juliana would have to check for wings later, cause her dreams were no longer fiction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Muy cursi?  
> Sorry for taking so long to publish something new dsiocndjsk  
> I may or may not have some other drafts with Olivia but i don't know if you guys are gonna like stuff like this  
> 


	2. insomnia

Valentina grabbed her phone from the bedside table to check the time, shoving her face on her pillow to muffle the annoyed sound she released. It was still 3 A.M. when she gave up on falling back asleep, she’d have a really long day ahead of her.

The woman got up from her bed carefully so she wouldn’t wake her wife up, who seemed to be having a really good uninterrupted night of sleep. Valentina had struggled with insomnia on some periods of her life before, but that didn’t reduce the stress she felt from the lack of sleep.

She decided to get some fresh air and, on the way to the apartment’s porch, she silently opened the door to her daughter’s room. Valentina couldn’t help it, every single time she woke up in the middle of the night she had to go check on Olivia to make sure everything was okay.

Usually the little girl was deep asleep whenever her mother checked on her, but the sight in front of Valentina made her really worried.

Olivia was quietly sobbing, latching onto her bedsheets with her little hands. She seemed to be in a state of alert, looking around her room and gasping once she saw her mother on the door, which made her cry even harder.

“Baby, I’m sorry,” Valentina exclaimed, quickly making her way to her daughters bed and turning on the lamp on her bedside table once she got there “It’s just me, It’s mamá.”

Valentina kneeled in front of her daughter’s bed so she could look her in the eyes and started running her hands through her daughter’s hair, on a failed attempt to soothe her.

“What happened, mi amor?” The woman asked, worried.

Olivia tried to say something, but her words were mixed with her sobs and her mother couldn’t really understand anything she was saying.

“Hey, it’s okay.” Valentina got up to sit on her daughter’s bed.

Olivia instantly threw herself on Valentina’s arms and hid her face on her neck. Valentina just held her and stroked her hair for a while until the little girl could actually say something understandable.

“Mamá, can you call mami?” Olivia asked rubbing her eyes, still looking really startled.

“Mami can’t come right now, but I can help you, baby” Valentina said planting a kiss on her daughter’s forehead “So, what is disturbing my little girl’s sleep at 3 A.M.?” she continued in a playful tone.

“My friends told me that when you wake up in the middle of the night it means the monsters are coming after you.” The young girl said, sniffing “But mami told me she knew a secret melody to keep them away.”

Valentina’s heart melted with Olivia’s innocence (and of course she made a mental note to talk to the preschool teachers about some stories that were going around amongst the kids).

“Well, what if I told you that mami taught me that melody years ago?” The woman said trying to calm her daughter down.

“Can you sing it, mamá?” The blue eyed child asked, her voice cracking mid-sentence, breaking Valentina’s heart along with it.

“Of course, mi amor.” Valentina laid down awkwardly on the way too small for her bed so that Olivia would be on a fine position to sleep.

Olivia had one of her thumbs inside her mouth and her free arm was clinging her mother’s shoulder when Valentina started humming the first calm song that came to her mind. As soon as started, though, Juliana entered the room.

“Are you guys having a sleepover without me?” She asked, almost in a whisper. Juliana knew they wouldn’t all fit in the small bed, so she grabbed a chair from a corner of the room and placed it near where the rest of her family were, next to her daughter.

“Estás bien, mi amor?” Juliana asked with her lips pressed against her daughter’s hair, pressing a kiss on the spot while rubbing her back.

“Shh, mamá is scaring the monsters away.” Olivia answered in a tired tone, still protesting when her mother tried to move her hand from her back.

Valentina resumed her humming, a bit more shyly this time. No matter how much time passed, the older woman was still slightly embarrassed of singing in front of her wife.

Juliana was staring lovingly at the blue eyed woman. Those rare chances she got to hear her sing were her favorite moments, Valentina’s voice was beautiful. At that moment her heart was filled with pure bliss.

The sight of Olivia falling asleep, her thumb slipping out of her opened mouth, rested against Valentina and the beautiful tone of the woman’s singing filling the room; her hand rested on her daughter’s back, feeling the rise and fall of her ribs as she breathed. Everything was so real.

Juliana was suddenly pulled out of her daze by Valentina’s singing stopping mid-song.

“No, go on!” The younger woman protested.

“Juls, Olivia is already asleep.” Valentina whispered her answer.

“Well, I’m still awake,” Juliana half-joked, causing Valentina to release a silent laugh “Let’s go back to our room.”

Valentina nodded, carefully unwrapping Olivia from her and placing her on the bed. The women left the room hand in hand after kissing their daughter good night.

Juliana was halfway across the hall when she felt Valentina pulling her hand so that she would turn to face her. The older one wrapped her arms around her wife’s neck as soon as she was within reach.

“You’re the cheesiest person I know,” Juliana told her wife, placing a kiss on her cheek and wrapping her arms around Valentina’s waist “You really chose the song from our first dance.” She whispered lovingly.

“You love me, though,” Valentina teased “Why are you awake?”

“The bed felt really cold without you there.”

“Who’s cheesy now?”

Juliana laughed, separating their embrace, but not moving too much from her position. She grabbed both of Valentina’s hand on hers and let it hang between them. The blue eyed woman leaned forward a little bit to place a chaste kiss on her wife’s lips.

“Let’s go to bed, I’m really tired.” Valentina led Juliana to their room through their joined hands. 

Something about the inner peace she felt at that moment made Valentina fall back asleep as soon as she laid down, like her insomnia never even existed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope yall enjoyed it :) feedback is always much appreciated also i'm always open for chatting on @arnies-bitch on tumblr (i need some friends on the juliantina fandom lol)


	3. ballet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Little Olivia's first ballet recital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for the Juliantina appreciation week #2 day 7 - Free day

“Ok, Vale, you know I love Libby with all my heart, but I’m not going to seat through a two hour children ballet recital of Pollyanna.”

“Guille, that is not up to discussion,” Valentina snapped at her brother “It’s her first recital and she wants her favorite uncle there.”

The discussion between the siblings was taking a really long time. To be fair, Valentina really did think Guille was being a horrible uncle, that was Olivia’s first recital and she was really loving ballet classes. It would mean the world to her if her whole family was there.

“Vale, I’m her only uncle.” Guille said over the phone.

“Exactly!” Valentina exclaimed, becoming extremely annoyed.

“Val, let me take care of this.” Juliana whispered to her wife softly, reaching for the phone.

Valentina felt grateful Juliana was willing to take that bullet for her, discussing with Guille was always hell. She passed her wife the phone.

“Guille, tu vas al pinche concierto y ya.” Juliana said in a low but extremely intimidating tone, she then proceeded to hang up the phone and hand it back to Valentina.

The older woman had a shocked expression on her face before she started laughing. She didn’t think she’d ever seen such a threatening tone coming from Juliana before, she was extremely satisfied it was directed to her brother and not her.

“I love you so much.” Valentina said, still laughing and picking her phone back from her wife.

“He was being an idiot,” Juliana said, chuckling a little herself “And I love you too.”

Valentina smiled at the woman in front of her and went in for a hug. Juliana corresponded the embrace, holding both of her wife’s cheek and pulling her in for a kiss.

Out of the many types of kisses they’d shared throughout the years, that was one of Valentina’s favorite. It was playful, with them both smiling on each other’s lips, but full of love.

“Ew!” A high pitched voice commented from the door of the room.

They separated their kiss, both women still laughing. Juliana rushed towards Olivia and picked her up on her lap, kissing her face multiple times.

“Stop!” Olivia said, laughing.

“No.” Juliana said in between kisses, making the little girl laugh even harder.

Valentina joined the two girls, standing beside Olivia and planting a final kiss on her cheek after Juliana finally stopped.

“This is disgusting.” Olivia said, having a hard time pronouncing the word.

“Someone’s learning big words in school!” Valentina exclaimed, feeling proud of her daughter even though she was fake insulting them “What do you want, baby?”

“I can’t find Mimi.” The little girl said, with a small pout forming on her lips.

“That can’t happen,” Juliana said in a joking tone, placing her daughter back on the floor and grabbing her by her hand “Let’s go find her right now.”

Olivia extended her other hand to Valentina, who grabbed it with a big smile on her face.

The family walked into Olivia’s room and Juliana instantly saw her daughter stuffed animal under her bed. She looked at Valentina and realized her wife had seen the same thing. They still decided to do a fake search on the entire room before grabbing from under their daughter’s bed.

“Now you need to go to bed,” Valentina said, placing the toy on Olivia’s arm, “You need to be well rested for tomorrow.”

Olivia smiled widely, she was really excited for her first ballet presentation.

Juliana grabbed the girl once again and placed her in her bed, kissing her forehead before wishing her a good night and leaving the room. Valentina copied her steps, joining her wife in their room.

“Can you believe our baby girl is going to have her first recital tomorrow?” Juliana asked once Valentina walked into their room.

“She’s getting big too fast.” Valentina said nodding her head a little.

“Also, can you believe how much of an asshole your brother is being?” Juliana sat on the edge of the bed and looked at Valentina with a playful smile.

Valentina threw her head back, laughing, and then she took a sit next to her wife, placing her hand in one of her knees.

“He always is,” Valentina played along. A sigh soon followed her sentence “Libby would be so sad if he weren’t there.”

“Val, he’s coming,” Juliana tried soothing the older woman “He’s just trying to pretend he’s not a doting uncle.”

“He might also be scared of you.” Valentina laughed, recalling the tone her wife used with her brother just a little earlier.

Silence fell upon them as Juliana watched her wife’s forehead wrinkling again. She placed her hand on top of Valentina’s one, that was still resting on her knee, and leaned in, kissing her cheek softly.

“Mi amor, you don’t have to worry about that,” Juliana said “Liv will still have a good time, even without Guille there.”

Valentina turned her head and nodded, with a small smile on her lips.

“Something tells me we will also have to be well rested for tomorrow.” Valentina said with a wider smile after staring at Juliana for a little.

\---

Valentina wasn’t wrong. The recital might have been planned for 5 PM, but stress came to their home way earlier than that. The day was full of yelling around the house, coming from all of them.

“Where are the bobby pins?”

“Val, do we have any red lipstick?”

“Mamá, I can’t find my slippers.”

Those were just some of the things yelled on the small hallway. Around lunch time things were just completely chaotic. For some reason all the students had to be on the dance academy three hours before the presentation, that meant that at 2 PM, Olivia had to show up ready for the recital.

The young mothers didn’t think that would be a struggle, but at 1 PM their daughter still didn’t have her stage makeup on and was crying over a few drops of tomato sauce on her pink costume.

“Baby, it’s okay,” Juliana said with the crying girl in her arms “No one will even notice, everyone will be too busy watching you dance.”

She sighed once that didn’t work out and the little girl kept on crying.

“Libby, you’ll have so much glitter on that it’ll be impossible not to look at your face.” She tried again, succeeding a little. Now the girl wasn’t full on sobbing and just silently crying.

Olivia hid her face on her mother’s neck, feeling tired. Juliana placed a kiss on the top of her daughter’s head and bounced her a little in her arms to try to make her happier.

“Amorcito?” They heard Valentina coming down the hallway. The older woman had a small pouch on her hand and shook it a bit when she was getting closer to her family “We have to do your makeup.”

That seemed to be the most successful way of getting Olivia to stop crying. The girl’s face suddenly brightened up and she had a smile on her lips again.

“I got her, Juls.” Valentina said to her wife, extending her arms so that their daughter could be transferred to her lap.

“Thank you, amor,” Juliana said while the other woman made her way to the couch with the little girl “I’ll get the rest of her things ready.”

Juliana ran to Olivia’s room in order to gather everything they needed, while Valentina opened the small pouch and pulled some makeup out of it.

The family didn’t take too long to be in the car on their way to the dance academy. Olivia seemed to be really excited, the whole car ride consisted of her talking about different ballet steps she was learning. Soon she was being dropped off with her teacher to what seemed to be a last rehearsal, leaving the couple with a few stress free hours.

\---

“I can’t believe he didn’t come.” Valentina whispered to Juliana as the first act of the night stepped on the stage.

Valentina looked at the entrance of the theatre once again, hoping to see her brother walking through it.

“He’s unbelievable,” She huffed as small children twirled around stage “I’m going to kill him.” 

Juliana reached for her wife’s hand, trying to calm her down a little. Guille might not have shown up, but the whole Carvajal family was there, sitting next to Lupe and Panchito. Still, the two empty seats next to Valentina seemed to bother her more than anything.

Around the third act of the night, Valentina was startled by a whisper coming from right next to her.

“Sorry I’m late, hermanita.” Guille said before sitting down.

Valentina turned with all the intentions of hitting her brother until she saw his face was hidden by a huge bouquet of roses. That made her heart melt a little. She quickly looked past Guille and waved a quick hello to his wife before redirecting her attention to the man.

“She has you tied on her little finger.” Valentina whispered to her brother with a smile.

“Libby is my second favorite girl in the world,” Guille smiled back at his sister “Tied with Bela, of course.” He complete, referring to his other niece, who was sitting next to Juliana.

Valentina heard the audience burst in applause, making her snap out of her little moment with her brother and clap along. She almost gasped when she saw Olivia and her classmates tip toeing onto the stage right after.

“She looks so beautiful, Juls!” Valentina smiled widely leaning her head on Juliana’s shoulder.

“It’s our little girl.” Juliana said with a huge smile at her face once their daughter started dancing around stage.

Halfway through the dance, Juliana looked at Valentina, wanting to say something about the song, but she changed plans once she saw her wife’s eyes filling up with tears.

“Are you crying, mi amor?” Juliana squeezed Valentina’s hand a little, making the older woman look at her.

“I’m just so proud of her.” Valentina’s voice trembled a little, making Juliana laugh lightly.

“Me too, amor,” She said after dropping a quick kiss on the back of her wife’s hand before pointing to her brother “And it seems like we’re not the only ones.”

Valentina threw a confused look to Juliana before turning her head, just to see Guille’s tears begin to form.

“I thought you didn’t want to come.” Valentina teased her brother.

“Shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry i didn't post anything yesterday yall, but hope you enjoyed seeing olivia again, it's been a while :)

**Author's Note:**

> feedback is much appreciated if you wanna talk to me my tumblr is @arnies-bitch :)


End file.
